Don't desire her more than you do me. I'd like to think you'd have followed me The urge to invite myself over to your house so I can be in your presence is overwhelming.
If you were mine, though, I wouldn't hurt you like that again. It only pains me so for fear. I shall go on from this question. You said the other day, in a conversation about Latin, how you perceived and respected the power of words. The best answer I have is that I thought of you as impenetrable. I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I can try; I am trying.
Unfortunately, as of yet, I've seen no how-to guide for that--which means I'm making that up as I go along. Regardless, now I try, with honesty and probably negativity. I'm still not really sure how much I hurt you; you never came to me. If you arhwp, non-smoker and believe in life is about living and taking a chance please send a picture and write "journey" in the reply and tell me about yourself.
Probably crying at home, based on my tendencies as of late. Speaking of jealousy, it's unexpectedly better.
Oh well. Enjoy being with someone who can appreciate the simple things in life like walks with conversations and holding hands, driving to the beach and catching a sunset, go hiking for the day, someone I can help cook a meal, cleanup and afterwards sit next to a fireplace or put a movie in and snuggle on the couch.
I wonder if they'll ever go away if I don't voice them to you. I suppose I don't see how you couldn't. I don't, really. I'm not entirely sure in what context I'm supposed to answer this question. I can tell now you truly meant it. Coffee Anyone?
Damaged should be a banned word. I wonder what you would have done had I walked in.
Are all relationship ends this difficult? I'm not entirely sure if you meant them to be rhetoriy, a device allowing me to both see how you're thinking and a tool for self-realization. I'm not damaged. Don't leave me. Thank you for reading and I hope to hear from you soon Brandon, I have too many emotions. I don't even know why I want to know that.
Damned poor self-esteem. You can trust that I'd try to support you and show you my love to the best of my hopefully growing ability. Perhaps I'd try to censor my thoughts, and I don't think that would be a wise decision. I can't say I'm never going to hurt you again Blah blah blah cliched people make mistakes.
I don't really want to read over them, though, for a multitude of reasons. I wonder if that's healthy, if I'm only setting myself up to hurt more later. I suppose I'll answer the questions you left me. In fact, it is from now on.
Oh, I failed.
I don't think I realized I could actually hurt you. I don't remember them being so hard, but then, I suppose you never remember the heat of the flame so much as when you're trapped in it. Despite that, I feel lost--and the feeling of lost is most likely a pervasive, persistent one that I'll have to work on for years. Care for me. It still burns my heart to think of you with another, but I can shut that off; partition my heart and mind away.
I remember a few months ago you said that once you're done with someone, that's it. I am single and enjoy playing basketball,tennis,golf 5' lbs.
Love me. I can think of a very few select times where you've appeared vulnerable to me--I wonder if that's because of confidence in your own self.
How could these arbitrary symbols accurately convey how utterly impossible it is for me to resist the urge to be near you--even when you don't want me? Am I just crazy? If the happy, sunshiney daylight hours don't lend me strength to resist contacting you, the night has no chance. Fear that I'm damaged. I haven't read any of these thoughts over--perhaps doing so would reveal the opposite.
What can you trust? My name's Shelby.
You told me I need to learn to be responsible for my emotions. The questions plague me. I wish I could be in your mind, to see how you feel towards me. Want me.
Perhaps doing so would reinstate the more crazy emotions, like irrational jealousy, that aren't in me right now. Again, stream of conscious, so if it seems like I divert from the question You know, Brandon, if I had the answer to that, I'd have shared that with you long ago. To know what I was doing?
As I've told you, it helps me find meaning; helps me find a reason to continue this odd thing known as life. If you asked a friend of mine how they would describe me they would say I was a loyal friend, laid back, enjoy meeting new people, that I have a good personality and am a good listener who can laugh at himself, spiritual, enjoy living in the present and open to life's possibilities. A person can't be damaged. That's how I feel right now.
Whether I'm an extraneous person who occasionally makes your life more dramatic and negative. God, the last part You didn't cheat on me; I had fucked everything up by that point. I'm not supposed to talk about you in a question that's about me.
When was it? I like to help people. A part of this whole affair of me and you that confuses me the most? Did you enjoy being with her more?
Battle creek enquirer from battle creek, michigan · 30
I see beauty in some things, and the excitement I draw from them seems like it should be enough happiness for anybody. Words are woefully inadequate.
I like to make them happy. I'm a girl, just like a million others. I think, at least. The tug at my heart, the tug I somehow feel physiy, against all logical reasoning. Fear that I'm not good enough for you; fear that I can't give you what you need.
I don't know. The comparisons in my mind, though, know no end.